One was wonderful. He was honest, helpful, and came across as a decent guy who was trying to help me out. I’m happy to give you his name. It’s Jordan Ross from 8 Figure Agency.
The other guy was awful. He came across as a slimy bullshitter. My subconscious was yelling at me, “Don’t trust this guy.” The Proverb spoke to me: “Leave the presence of a fool or you will not discern words of wisdom.”
But feelings from the id aren’t very helpful. I wanted to quantify what I was feeling. What was the bullshitter doing that gave me this instinctive reaction of disgust? Could I explain it?
I no longer had any interest in his presentation, except to come up with a list. I opened up a document and titled it “the tells of a bullshitter.”
This is what I came up with.
How do you recognize a bullshitter?
- They want you to affirm or compliment them in cringy ways.
- They frequently insist on their honesty or piety.
- They want you to “participate” in their presentation in condescending ways. Stuff fit for a 3 year old.
- They talk too damned much. It’s like they want to wear you out to break down your defenses so you’ll say anything just to get them to stop talking.
- They show all the signs of narcissism. Narcissistic individuals often display a need for admiration, a sense of entitlement, and a tendency to dominate conversations.
- They’re shameless.
That seemed like a good start, but I wanted more, so I asked ChatGPT, which gave me a few more characteristics.
They frequently make vague or exaggerated claims: Bullshitters tend to make grandiose or ambiguous statements without providing specific details. So pressing them for details is a good way to expose them.
Along with this is a lack of consistency. It’s hard to keep your story straight when you’re making it up on the fly.
This also causes them to dodge direct questions, and fail to provide supporting evidence for their claims.
They tend to overuse buzzwords or jargon to create the illusion of expertise or knowledge.
There’s an inconsistency in their body language. Bullshitters may exhibit signs of discomfort, such as fidgeting, avoiding eye contact, or displaying defensive body language when questioned or challenged. Although, frankly, when you see these things you’re dealing with a human who’s uncomfortable with his lies. The real problem is the person who shows no discomfort when he lies.
Bullshitters tend to dismiss or invalidate perspectives that don’t go along with their narrative.
And, as I said in my list, there’s constant self promotion.
Which leads me to bullshitter tactics
It’s one thing to recognize a bullshitter when you’re speaking to him, and can see him. You have lots of senses on the alert. But what about email? How do bullshitters abuse that channel?
- Excessive flattery.
- Pretended urgency.
- Ambiguity.
- Exaggerated promises.
- Misleading subject lines.
- Manipulative language.
I asked some friends for their examples, and they suggested the following.
“I’m following up on a call/email” when they never did.
“Are you receiving my emails?”
“Don’t want to hear from me? Reply with ‘no.’” But they don’t honor that.
How do you recognize a bullshitter?
